Author Topic: Worse mess ever driving me insane - Help?????  (Read 1572 times)

Googley

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Worse mess ever driving me insane - Help?????
« on: Jul 29, 2010, 05:05:55 PM »
My husband has been self-employed for 12 years and with his pride he has never made a profit.  We survived when I used to work as I subsidised his debts and paid them for him.  For the last 5 years I have been disabled through illness and struggled to survive as suffer both physical and mental problems now.
 
We have had several loans to keep his business going some commercial some private, probably every high street name.  Debts must be around £220,000 now and we can no longer make minimum payments.  In fact I cant even speak to him anymore and our marriage is just destroyed.  He just wont give up thinking success is just around the corner.  3 times he has taken credit on my name without my consent or permission - even gave me a £10,000 overdraft I cant pay back and trying to pay something out of my disability money.  What worse we have a beautiful 4 year old girl and I am so trying not to tear her life apart with divorce and moving but I know its going to come sooner or later.
 
Now the tricky bit - the worst debt is to a family member who is completely unaware of our circumstances.  We owe him £100,000 and now he wants it back.  We do have 3 mortgaged houses in our names, one has equity of around £30,000 and may manage to get £70,000 from the other 2 to repay my relative.  I know this will leave us homeless but I would rather die than let the family know in fact I tried to kill myself recently but obviously it didnt work.
 
Would it be the best plan to follow what I think above and then go bankrupt for all the commercial debts?  My husband runs a food shop so I believe the OR wont be interested in his stock and the property is leased.
 
Our credit scores are now bad and nobody will lend any more money to him - thank god.  Not a penny ever went in the house but just on business debts.  Now I am thinking about ending it all again.
 
Any help would be really appreciated.

Steven Jackson

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Re: Worse mess ever driving me insane - Help?????
« Reply #1 on: Jul 29, 2010, 05:24:29 PM »
Hello Googley
 
I am very sorry to hear about your situation. It sounds like a nightmare for you. PLease remember, you have your daughter to think about and you need to be there for her. That is the most important thing.
 
I understand you desperately wanting to pay back the family member. You can do this by selling your properties but, and this is the problem,  if you went down this route you would NOT then be able to go bankrupt. This is because paying back the family member would be seen as a preferential payment (preferencing them against the other creditors). If this happened any time within 5 years of declaring bankrutpcy, the official receiver could go to the family member and demand the money back anyway to share amongst all of the creditors.
 
If you do pay back the family member in this way, the only option to deal with the remaining debt will be debt management. However, this is far from ideal because you will have lost everything and would still be facing a massive debt. You would then have to wait a further 5 years before bankruptcy became an option.
 
Is there absolutely no way you can tell they family member what has happened? If you could do this, you could potentially do an IVA, get rid of the commercial creditors and then pay the familiy member back in full privately over a longer period.
 
Debt Expert
ivainformation.com

Googley

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Re: Worse mess ever driving me insane - Help?????
« Reply #2 on: Jul 29, 2010, 07:18:12 PM »
Hi Steven and thanks for the reply, all info really helpful at the moment until I can come up with a survival plan if possible (apart from winning the lottery)!!
 
In answer to your question:
 
"Is there absolutely no way you can tell they family member what has happened? If you could do this, you could potentially do an IVA, get rid of the commercial creditors and then pay the familiy member back in full privately over a longer period."
 
The family member has just asked for all their money back as they are selling their own property and want to combine funds to purchase a new one elsewhere.  To actually tell them their money is gone without selling our assets would be a disgrace I just couldnt live with.  I would rather risk getting thrown into jail by the OR than letting the truth out as it was given with such faith and trust.  I have so little family and its only this one person I have in my life and I just couldnt bear to destroy their lives as they are even older than me with chronic back problems and will have to stop work soon so I just couldnt do it to them and live with myself.
 
Just for clarification how do you get rid of the commercial creditors in an IVA or does it just mean slow payments until they are gone - probably around £100,000 or you can get part written off???
 
Thanks

Steven Jackson

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Re: Worse mess ever driving me insane - Help?????
« Reply #3 on: Aug 02, 2010, 02:43:57 PM »
Hi Googley
 
An IVA is a formal debt management solution which allows you to settle debts over a fixed period of time (normally 5 years). At the end of the five years, whatever debt has not been paid is written off leaving you debt free.
 
If you owe £100k and have no other assets, it will probably require a payment of £500 - £550 a month to make an IVA work.
 
However, if you try and pay your family off first, you will be prevented from doing an IVA in the same way as bankruptcy as it would be seen as a preferential payment.
 
As such, if you feel compelled to sell your properties to pay your family, the only real option after that is a debt management plan which would last untill all of the debt was paid
Debt Expert
ivainformation.com

Googley

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Re: Worse mess ever driving me insane - Help?????
« Reply #4 on: Aug 02, 2010, 07:25:31 PM »
Thanks for that advice stephen, I hadnt thought of that.  Going to write to some credit cards and see what we can sort out about repayment plans.
 

AshleyPark

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Re: Worse mess ever driving me insane - Help?????
« Reply #5 on: Aug 09, 2010, 05:05:34 PM »
Hi Googley,
 
Be sure to let us know how you are getting on.
 
Lee
Ashley Park Debt Solutions Ltd
 http://www.ashleypa

Googley

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Re: Worse mess ever driving me insane - Help?????
« Reply #6 on: Aug 14, 2010, 03:27:16 PM »
I have the interest frozen on 2 credit cards and am now negotiating with the rest.  Virgin rang today for me to take out a consilidation loan but told them to get lost.
 
Will work on the rest soon, trying to sell my property to sort things out but have tenants with AST in until December and the other tenant has done a runner with the keys so I am locked out for 2 months and then have to go to court.  Can live get any worse?